Wednesday, 22 February 2012
Last week I had to catch a train on my way to London at an unfashionable hour for an early meeting for the Hawk and Owl Trust. It started at 9.30am, which for me means a very early start to feed and take out the dogs and feed the horse before leaving. The only upside being that the traffic going into Gloucester was almost nil, so I made the train in good time. However I had forgotten just how awful it is to get on a very crowded tube train, I nearly chickened out, but realised that I would only have to get onto one just as full if I did.I have an impressive black eye! Karis decided to miss the overhead pass and fly at full tilt into my face, thank goodness he is OK, does not seem to have suffered, but we are giving him a couple of days off before flying him again!
Leaf is growing very fast, she runs all the way down to the café at coffee and lunch time now, and does not ask to be picked up. It has warmed up a little so it is safe to let her out and she is going to be pretty easy to house train I think. Of course as she gets older and stronger she also plays for longer, so life gets interesting in the evenings. Sedge is beginning to play with her and Sorrel is just wonderful, so gentle, although it is a little odd to see Leaf with her whole head inside Sorrel’s mouth.
It was half term week and we were nicely busy with visitors which is lovely to see, the weather so far has been kind, although I am told it is going to get colder again. Its good when the Centre is busy. We had our last Owl Evenings until Halloween the weekend before last, they went well, although on the Saturday night it was -5C by the time we were flying the owls outside!! That made sitting on the benches a little chilly I have to say, but the clear sky and stars made for a magical experience and all had a great time. Talking of owls Ruby frightened us a few days ago, she was not looking well so we brought her in, gave her some fluids and put her on a course of antibiotics, but by the afternoon we were not hopeful, and she is 11 years old this year, however by the evening she thought she might be able to toy with a chick to eat, I put the heating on in the Utility room and she stayed in her box in there for about four or five days, she recovered well and is back out in her aviary again and we were all very relieved.
The breeding season is upon us and Simon has hatched the first baby – a Tawny Eagle, who will stay with us if all goes well. We do have one difficulty, a wild Common Buzzard keeps trying to pair up with one of our captive ones, she is always around the aviary block causing trouble. We did have an interesting thought, she is on view to the public and therefore in terms of the British legislation we are benefitting commercially from her! But we have no paperwork – what a dilemma!
The extension to the top middle lawn in the Hawk Walk had kites on it for the first time and Mark is now struggling with the lower middle lawn – not that I am sympathetic as they wanted to do it!! I told Mark that I hoped that next winter we would have no projects, he did not believe me, I am not sure that I believe myself! Next will be the benches round the walnut tree and then we start to get ready for the various celebrations for our 45th anniversary, which is exciting.Soon I will have to tell you about the bed saga, it’s a corker!! But in the meantime………………
SOCIALISM
You have 2 cows.
You give one to your neighbour.
COMMUNISM
You have 2 cows.
The state takes both and gives you some milk.
FASCISM
You have 2 cows.
The state takes both and sells you some milk.
NAZISM
You have 2 cows.
The state takes both and shoots you.
BUREAUCRATISM
You have 2 cows.
The state takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then throws the milk away.
TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.
You sell them and retire on the income.
ROYAL BANK OF SCOTLAND (VENTURE) CAPITALISM
You have two cows.
You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened
by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated
general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows.
The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island
Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven
cows back to your listed company.
The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more.
You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows.
No balance sheet provided with the release.
The public then buys your bull.
SURREALISM
You have two giraffes.
The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.
AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow has dropped dead.
A FRENCH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You go on strike, organize a riot, and block the roads, because you want three cows.
A JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
You then create a clever cow cartoon image called a Cowkimona and market it worldwide.
AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows, but you don’t know where they are.
You decide to have lunch.
A SWISS CORPORATION
You have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you.
You charge the owners for storing them.
A CHINESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them.
You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity.
You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.
AN INDIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You worship them.
A SPANISH CORPORATION
You have 2 cows but owe Santander for 6.
Nobody drinks milk.
You have a siesta and read about the collapse of the Euro
A GREEK CORPORATION
You lease 2 cows and pay somebody 3 times the going rate to milk them using borrowed money.
You refinance the 4 cows to secure the services of Goldman Sachs. They sell the future milk
production of the 60 cows and fund your lifestyle.
You retire to anywhere that doesn’t use the Euro.
A BRITISH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
Both are mad but awfully nice.
AN IRAQI CORPORATION
Everyone thinks you have lots of cows.
You tell them that you have none.
No-one believes you, so they bomb the crap out of you and invade your country.
You still have no cows, but at least you are now a democracy.
AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
Business seems pretty good.
You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate.
A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION
You have two cows.
The one on the left looks very attractive.
AN ARGENTINIAN CORPORATION
You don't have any cows.
But you claim sovereignty over the ones belonging to your neighbour
You have 2 cows.
You give one to your neighbour.
COMMUNISM
You have 2 cows.
The state takes both and gives you some milk.
FASCISM
You have 2 cows.
The state takes both and sells you some milk.
NAZISM
You have 2 cows.
The state takes both and shoots you.
BUREAUCRATISM
You have 2 cows.
The state takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then throws the milk away.
TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.
You sell them and retire on the income.
ROYAL BANK OF SCOTLAND (VENTURE) CAPITALISM
You have two cows.
You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened
by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated
general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows.
The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island
Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven
cows back to your listed company.
The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more.
You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows.
No balance sheet provided with the release.
The public then buys your bull.
SURREALISM
You have two giraffes.
The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.
AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow has dropped dead.
A FRENCH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You go on strike, organize a riot, and block the roads, because you want three cows.
A JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
You then create a clever cow cartoon image called a Cowkimona and market it worldwide.
AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows, but you don’t know where they are.
You decide to have lunch.
A SWISS CORPORATION
You have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you.
You charge the owners for storing them.
A CHINESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them.
You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity.
You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.
AN INDIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You worship them.
A SPANISH CORPORATION
You have 2 cows but owe Santander for 6.
Nobody drinks milk.
You have a siesta and read about the collapse of the Euro
A GREEK CORPORATION
You lease 2 cows and pay somebody 3 times the going rate to milk them using borrowed money.
You refinance the 4 cows to secure the services of Goldman Sachs. They sell the future milk
production of the 60 cows and fund your lifestyle.
You retire to anywhere that doesn’t use the Euro.
A BRITISH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
Both are mad but awfully nice.
AN IRAQI CORPORATION
Everyone thinks you have lots of cows.
You tell them that you have none.
No-one believes you, so they bomb the crap out of you and invade your country.
You still have no cows, but at least you are now a democracy.
AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
Business seems pretty good.
You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate.
A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION
You have two cows.
The one on the left looks very attractive.
AN ARGENTINIAN CORPORATION
You don't have any cows.
But you claim sovereignty over the ones belonging to your neighbour
Wednesday, 8 February 2012
I just watched the news and when I watch politicians answering questions I feel that actually their only real talent is to completely avoid the question and never admit culpability. It pisses me off that the Opposition, in this case the Labour Government, constantly moans and bitches about the financial cuts without ever accepting that they were the cause for running the country into the ground in the first place. Britain, amazingly, appears to be still reasonable OK in terms of our credit worldwide, particularly in comparison to most of the countries on the Continent, and it is mainly because we are actually facing up to our debts and our existing government is trying to mitigate them.
We went to the Spring Fair yesterday – exhausting!! But I think we have found some really nice stuff for the shop this year, now we have the fun of waiting for it to arrive and the less fun of paying for it! The cold persists, the birds are flying well, my staff are as amazing as ever, Angela is going to do oven chips in the café and they are rather good, we have of course been testing them. Come and say hello everyone. Oh and I hope you are all enjoying Mozart’s Story.
The Dog's Diary:
8:00 am - Dog food! My favourite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favourite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favourite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favourite thing!
12:00 pm - Milk bones! My favourite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favourite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favourite thing!
5:00 pm - Dinner! My favourite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favourite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favourite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favourite thing!
The Cat's Diary:
Day 983 of my captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates my capabilities. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. Jerks!
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released, and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird must be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now.
Saturday, 4 February 2012
Its snowing, so the forecast was right for a change, and as the ground is frozen it is settling, although I have to say I doubt we will get four inches. We were wondering why some snowflakes are really small and some are huge, most of these are really small, is it to do with the temperature, or what I wonder. Adam just flew Cool ground, the snowy owl in the snow which was fun, although it is a little cold to stay out in the flying field for long. I had to go to Yorkshire on Thursday, drove up with Anabelle and we went straight to Duncombe Park where we are starting a branch of the ICBP, Charlie was working away doing fencing around the tree protection areas. The planning conditions have come through, I have to say that Charlie is a lot nicer to the planners than I would be, particularly as there are a whole load of conditions that they did not refer to prior to the month late discussion of the planning application. They are insisting on a yearly Bat survey, although they have a letter from the most respected raptor scientist in the world telling them that our birds will not affect the bats, they have been told that we have an increasing populations of bats living on site at the Centre here in Newent although we fly upwards of 40 birds daily, often into the evenings and then do owl evenings as well. They do no bat surveys nor does Natural England on the sites that they own or run, or on our site in the past, but they have asked us to do it, which I have to say considering the letter from Professor Ian Newton which told them that the bats were quite safe, shows how very ignorant they are; in terms of what I have told them about our bat colony here, is sheer stupidity; and taking into consideration that they don’t do surveys themselves is sheer hypocrisy! However Charlie is much nicer than I am and so will probably not tell them this!!
I did a lecture in the evening for the Yorkshire Group of the BFC, what a nice bunch of people and they were really interesting in our starting the Yorkshire branch of ICBP at Duncombe Park. So hopefully they will get involved and be a part of it which would be great. Richard came up to look at the electrics on the site at Duncombe. Its amazing how busy Helmsley is, we had some lunch there and it is literally a 15 minute walk from the middle of the town to where our site is going to be.
We met the guy who hopefully will build the three larger barns for us, so he has gone away to do some paperwork and sums and then that will move onwards, its all exciting stuff. It was bloody cold up there, but not as cold as it was as we drove home. The temperature slowly dropped until as we drove through the gate at home it was -5C. Although we were lucky to get home because the suspension in the Range Rover started to fail on the M42 and we crawled home, I don’t think I have ever spent that long in the slow lane of a motorway!!!
We were held up on the M1 just at the M62 interchange, I thought it was weight of Friday traffic – was it hell, it was because there was an accident on the OTHER carriage way and people were slowing down and gawping. Whoever you were, you are disgusting and despicable! The police despise that sort of behaviour and rightly so, the ambulance and fire people rightly loath it, it causes accidents, it makes people late for appointments, costs thousands of us in an unnecessary queue extra money on fuel, so why do you do it, it’s disgraceful, if you were a vulture you would at least have an excuse, but for a supposedly intelligent creature, there is no excuse.
When I got home and started to catch up on the endless emails I found one from a website who wants me to pay to be on there and they can’t even spell correctly on their damn site!!! You really do wonder sometimes.
Holly looked after the dogs while I was away for the night and the puppy behaved, still don’t have a name that is right for her yet, and this cold weather means she can’t go outside, but she is enchanting when she plays with Sedge who is being very good with her.
Still snowing!!.........................
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